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Terrible cooks

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Re: Terrible cooks

Postby Renee » Wed Oct 10, 2018 9:47 am

A thought crossed my mind recently. Do we really need to use titles? Why not just the name.

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Re: Terrible cooks

Postby dennispc » Wed Oct 10, 2018 10:23 am

smitch wrote: Makes my blood boil!


As does mine when, on holiday trips, people realise I can cook etc., and tell OH, 'you've got him well trained'. NO! It was me who had to train OH to accept I could do things.

And with hotel buffets, watch couples come in, he sits down at a table whilst his partner gets his meal and then goes back for hers, when he does not have a disability.

Which brings me back to the OP. A BiL, widowed, came to visit. For breakfast we said everything's on the side, do help yourself. He moved to the dining table and gave his order, couldn't even manage toast!

We're all constrained by the culture of our upbringing.

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Re: Terrible cooks

Postby Suffs » Wed Oct 10, 2018 11:16 am

Renee wrote:A thought crossed my mind recently. Do we really need to use titles? Why not just the name.


I've never understood why people feel that we need to use titles (it was only so that the patriarchy would know who was responsible for any female they came across :roll: ) ... of course, nowadays computers 'need' a title box to be filled in ... all those programmes would have to be re-written :roll:

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Re: Terrible cooks

Postby Renee » Wed Oct 10, 2018 11:26 am

That's fine then Suffs! ;)

Tony Smith …. we know that's a man

Margaret Smith …… does it matter whether or not it's a Miss, Mrs or Ms?

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Re: Terrible cooks

Postby smitch » Wed Oct 10, 2018 12:17 pm

I also hate titles. I never use them when I write letters to people at work. The only people I've found who insist on them are (medical) doctors- the PhDs I know don't bother.

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Re: Terrible cooks

Postby Linnet » Wed Oct 10, 2018 12:21 pm

Agreed for a lot of written communications, which can just be addressed to Margaret Smith, but what about face to face meetings, where to greet for the first time say, the consultant at hospital, as Margaret or Tony would be overly familiar, but to say 'hello Margaret Smith', or just 'Smith' would be odd. There are still occasions when a 'handle' of some sort is required, which is easy when greeting a man.

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Re: Terrible cooks

Postby smitch » Wed Oct 10, 2018 12:37 pm

I know not everyone feels the same, but I'm perfectly happy to be referred to by my first name in meetings like that. My vet still insists on calling me 'Miss M...', despite the fact we're there pretty much every week at the moment :cry:

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Re: Terrible cooks

Postby Pampy » Wed Oct 10, 2018 1:00 pm

Renee wrote:
Tony Smith …. we know that's a man


But if the name was just spoken, not written down, Tony(i) Smith could be female, as could George (Georgina), Franci(e)s. Shirley (think "Big Daddy")...etc

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Re: Terrible cooks

Postby karadekoolaid » Thu Oct 11, 2018 12:08 am

I've never understood why people feel that we need to use titles (it was only so that the patriarchy would know who was responsible for any female they came across :roll: )

I suppose it used to be a sign of respect ( or kow-towing!) and perhaps these days, just a question of being formal in one´s greeting.
In the States, I´ve always found it slightly amusing how they refer to people as " Sir" and "Madam" because that´s what we used for our schoolteachers.
In many countries in Latin America, titles are obligatory - and IMHO a sign of grovelling subservience. If you have a degree, then it´s " Licenciado" ( BA) or " Ingeniero" (engineers) or even " Doctor" ( law degrees especially). Odious military popinjays are usually referred to ( here at least) as " Mi General" or " Mi Comandante", which makes me laugh cynically, because many of these people are supercilious and arrogant.
I get referred to as " Doctor" or " Jefe" ( boss) ; I´d rather they call me by my name - but I suppose it´s better than " hey, you".

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Re: Terrible cooks

Postby Stokey Sue » Thu Oct 11, 2018 12:18 am

Banks used to like titles, as unless you are Dr or Prof it halves the number of people who can attempt to impersonate you

Apart from that I don’t see a lot of use

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Re: Terrible cooks

Postby jeral » Sun Oct 14, 2018 2:38 pm

One courtesy title I hate is being called Madam which seems to me always to sound as if it's being used in a pejorative way.

On terrible cooks, I think it's fair to say that most people can cook but not as well as others especially with specific items, e.g. scrambled eggs, pastry. A good gravy, simple as it seems, isn't really if you want a good one, so I suppose a degree of patience is also needed that some people just don't have.

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Re: Terrible cooks

Postby Joanbunting » Sun Oct 14, 2018 3:28 pm

When we lived and worked in the Bahamas M was always called Teacher Bunting and I was referred to as Mistress bunting - always made me sound either a bit dodgy or as if i should adjust my elaborate head gear and arrange my crinoline.
Cooking for those you care about is the most profound expression of love - Anne-Sophie Pic

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